Hi! How's it going? Gosh, it's been how long since I regularly updated this little blog?
I have a quick confession to make (not to be confused with the length of this post. This will be a longish post.):
Motherhood isn't quite what I expected it to be.
I think everyone feels that way though, right? Especially with your first baby?
I thought she'd be on a "schedule" after a month or so. I'd know exactly when she needed to eat and sleep, oh and she'd only have one dirty diaper a day. HAH!
After two months in, I was getting frustrated. Why was she so unpredictable?! All of these other moms have their babies on a schedule by now! All of these other moms have the hang of feeding and changing MULTIPLE children while running a successful business and keeping their house in order and having a social life.
I just did not see how that would be possible. Ever.
I felt like my days were slipping away and I'd be lucky if I got to run a single errand or do a load of laundry. I loved my new baby girl so, so much...but I was also missing that "me" time where I got to accomplish the things I wanted to do that day. You know, life B.Z. (Before Zoe)
I emailed Hannah and she responded practically right away (I was so surprised, because if you read her blog you know she's a busy mama!) with words that were just what I needed to hear. She reminded me that every baby is different. Every parent is different. Every baby + their respective parents = a gazillion different ways to go about the day. Comparison is the thief of joy. As many times as I've heard this in the past, I finally understood what that meant. The beautiful newborn baby days were slipping away and I wasn't appreciating them for what they were.
I can vouch for that now. Within the past week, things have changed so fast. Zoe's eating less often and sleeping more regularly. I'm already missing those days of nonstop nursing and taking naps together throughout the day.
The expectations I placed on both myself and Zoe were ridiculous. I knew they were, but for some reason I just couldn't believe people who said to enjoy this precious time. I was ready for our lives to get back to "normal" and when I first realized they wouldn't be, I ended up mourning my old life while simultaneously being so excited for what the future had in store for our little family. It was a strange time of transition but I can honestly say I already miss those first few months and wish I had just let myself enjoy our new gift of life instead of trying to sprint towards whatever was "supposed" to come next.
For all of those expecting mothers out there, please don't make my mistake. Soak those newborn days in because they truly do fly by before you know it.